Between

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Between  sleep and dreams
 where poet ninja's
  burn the past
   once again 
    and again
  fighting battles real and metaphysical
   chasing the monsters away
    before you wake
Breaking the chains that bind
 to the destructive patterns that repeat
Somewhere between freedom and prison
 built in your mind
Traded eagle wings for carrion flight
 since freedom wasn't free, and a burden
  to a place called the Shadowland

The land of ghosts
 a parallel universe the phoenix in reverse
  falling to ashes was my curse
In the forest of shadows where vampires exist
 a place dividing dream from nightmare
  the place between a whisper and a scream
       a kiss and a cut
       where pleasure is pain
The land of in betweens
 trapped in the cosmic axis doorways entering the Multiverse

Trapped between here and there
 caught between a prayer and a curse
  between hunter and prey
   laughter and sorrow
    baptism and sin
     union and seperation
  between light and dark
    earth and sky
     silence and sound
The place between love and hate
 insanity and genius
 logic and illusion
You hear between truth and lies
 taste the color between sunrise and sunset
  the feeling between courage and fear
   the force between positive and negative

The place between Blinding Pristine White
and Deepest Darkest Black

The perfect shade of Gray

Existing on the edge of blessed and cursed
 the place between myth and legend
  a world of shadows and madness
   where you fall before regeneration
    the zone between angels and demons
     between somewhere and nowhere
      X marks the spot: You are Here

Lies the color of your soul
 a mixture of spirit and flesh
  here lies the answers that are within you
   between the journey of this life and the next
    between death and birth
Here is where you define your destiny
 and here is where you lead the way
  out of the shadows
Your only escape
 from here til then...


sb 2011

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Pinball Wizard

My soul is true and deep
Though you failed to see
What I carry inside and keep
Close to the nexus of what is me
Could explain why you don't care
You left a bruise
On the part of my soul I chose to bare
Only to you-- and there is no excuse
It was your choice to betray
What I held sacred and only for you
So it's not really okay
My soul is black and blue
My spirit a ghost
Through me you can see the stars
Though it's my demise you lust for most
Who knows-- since I am drowning my sorrows on Mars
(It's just a bar down the road--not too far)
Seeking any poison to cure
Or numb the screaming pain
Mainlining vodka (got any novocaine?) Gotta be sure
I can tap dance with madness straight through the vein
How else to save me from me?
Before you I was doing pretty good
Living in my own little world just being me
Once more I am totally misunderstood
If you hadn't been acting the fool
Selling out while losing your integrity
I use to think you were actually cool
You will never be truly free
If you continue to roll sleazy
Just another cheap dime store thug
Why you being stupid? Guess it comes easy
When your living low and spun out on drugs
It's actually tragic
Your so shallow and phony
Let your insecurities murder the magic
I don't think you will ever be
Again the guy I once met and knew
Long ago that was my friend
Looked me in the eye when he told me
Gave his word and shook my hand too
I guess that was a lie when you said we would be friends til the end?

I could never sell you out
Or in my heart wish you harm
Why did you even doubt
Let paranoia cause all this alarm
This has morphed from an external force
So strong I can't stop it-- so it feeds to divide
And keep us apart -- instead we collide, of course
Standing always on opposing sides
Caught in the circle jerk of life's crazy wild ride
That's why I am letting go -- I want to be done
Before I lose my soul like you.... I think
Your too damaged and it's not fun
Witnessing the depth you will sink
You've no moral compass inside, your character is not strong
This path will only end badly again
I thought I could believe in you, I was wrong
You were born in misery rancid with sin
I am only another in a long list of those you use
To exploit and discard, you don't care
After all you have nothing to lose
You took what you could knowing life's not fair
Time for me to get real stop singing the blues
Fucking a show to view in your hotel room
From the start it's been all lies and deception
It was wrong to think desperation would not lead to doom
Once you went from pipe to injection
Shooting poison straight to your infected mind
I should have realized you were already gone
From anywhere I could hope to find
You and rewind so that it was a new dawn
For you chose to let the ties that bind
You to the dark edges of your game in
Now nobody wins. Game over. The end.

Now your a tough guy with no one left to blame....

Just a pinball wizard, what a shame!

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Nobody Lives

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Nobody Gets Out Alive

Sing me a song of the blessed insane
Dance with me, still damned
Long echos of screaming….halls of wasted youth
A poet warrior last cry
Lost in the asylum’s shadow of pain
Her secrets too grotesque lay shattered & maimed
Beyond the hopelessly cracked lie
Only naked sun remains
Innocence murdered in dark
Let the chemicals induce once again
Promise prelude to narcotic hazed liquid sex
Tombed scents in cunt aroma
All the fucking to conjure this hex
The bitch’s vein ripped open by the needle’s
Slit as hemorrhaging forgotten morality
Your words were ashed while whiskey was soaking
In the tender too young yet to blame this diseased shame
Yet you would fuck rational thought
Instead of blame yourself for yesterday
So embrace the dark kiss
Softly upon the bitch’s lips
They slowly poison your mind
With sorrow so your spirit dips
An incubus dream in a jagged unholy wet find
Of desert cactus day motorcycle trips
Rivers of milky tears left behind
Moonlight guides mermaids in demonic flight
Through the oceans of all your god damn lies
If only you actually made sense—only to your shallow mind
Margaritas and bloody knifes of slashed endings
Sucked my summer cool—morphed into soul bruises
Tripped over your ego and slammed into my lost pride
No one wins and everybody dies
I knew that..but you still think you can cheat it
Destiny with hell’s new shiny razor, it’s you who chooses
To lose forever sacred secrets better kept inside
Now your just rancid  lust, all frail—pale nothing skies
Of so many missed chances to redeem the bad choices
Most Tragic!
Bitter misery of an ignorant son that was too selfsih
And nightwatchers screamed to roast the fiendish betrayers
“Your all swine and not meant for the deeper meaning!”
Ancient truths of Druids cosmic stars
So where does this leave us since killing all hope
Of shared life now aborted in smoked dope
No rockstars or poetry outlaws
Who wished for tomorrows less whores & liars
Fueled by delusions of greatness fades dimmer
The dsgrace washed away with heartbreak and soap
From the reality of the cruel nightmare you finally awoke
Legends still spoken by honor and now your broke
Good-bye wicked sleaze teaser of porn laced
Graced by all so selfish your lost in the
swagger and it’s no joke
Fuck the magic and spells smeared in a maze
Of disillusion pipe dream dew drop of a mentally
Fragile Moon genius who ran for seclusion
Lone wolf of the craft chose the only path
Camouflaged in dolphins and Jedi’s
Ninja’s and coolness. Camel Lights and Mad Dog
Mythic madness saved her. Exit the foul bane
Of the criminal ordinary mushy drain on the nightly news
We all sang “Freedomm 76” by Ween
Not Guilty made headlines that did heal
Germanic Nympho swimmer mother to felines
Tormented drummer who stood timeless
On Strawberry Fields
Once Shimmer—now still. We are all liars
Roses & Songs scar our sick skills
Manipulation, deception and phony feelings
Feelings we should but, do not feel— Emotions
Quickly slaughtered or we numbed. So we are kings
Or Queens of sociopathic nihilistic motions
That drive nails in our skulls
My life is rotting, we are damned, it makes me want to vomit
Nirvana is a false song sent that lulls
Anything still good or pure to a deep hole
And the irony makes me want to spit
On the absence void abyss of forever
Since you sold your soul.

i

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Whiskey Song

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this is
a sad song
of a lost girl
who already knew
she didn’t belong
little girl blue
fell til she bled
red stained tattoo
inside her soul
sleepless dreamer
retro emo-punk emulator
tiny monkey dancer
demented upside down clown
psycho misplaced anger
pink-love FOREVER craver
wedded bliss hooker
seriously headed into meltdown
you were tossed away
damaged goods, broken
mentally ill, drug thin
dark child of Tuesday
better in a coffin
doll rained in sin
fuck through the day
sing your whiskey
songs…..
sb

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Desperation

Watered down whiskey. Overflowing ashtray.  It's dawn and I fumble around for my leather jacket. I need to leave, because I just woke up, and I have no excuse to stay at this unfamiliar place. With a stranger who is sleeping naked beside me.  How could I expect anyone to forgive and forget all the bullshit drama I seem to need? Who is more pathetic, me or the masochistic motherfucker who wants to love me still? My life makes me want to vomit. Regrets and disgust. Headache. Morning cigarette. Public transportation.  I excuse myself from thinking.

Waiting for the world to change
Hoping to save
Her soul song a fate strange
Madness=mailine my pain
Slitip my razor
Shimmering slice of new dawn
In the absence of my soul 
My suffering spread
Hollow spirit
stained 

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When You Raise Your Frequency

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When you raise your frequency....
You move your frequency signature-- soul note-- to a higher harmonic-- you resonate to higher faster moving light energy.  Often, you hear tones.
The music you listen to-- is of a differnet harmonic.
Things beyond the third dimension call to you.

You become more aware of digital triggers - 11:11 -  333 --- seeing them more often.
You see and hear signs everywhere - such as a song played on the radio or something on TV that brings an immediate message. You might see a message on a billboard - the liscense plates of the car in front of you -- clouds or rainbows patterns in the sky -- stars that twinkle as if a signal -- the messages are all around you if you just  "Look".



The synchronicities in your life increase and you understand the "bigger" picture of what your soul is trying to say to you....

You realize there are no accidents. You are attracting the events in your life.
You allow events to unfold as the best things that happen to you happen by synchronicity.
You attract people int o your life who are of "like mind"-- their goals similiar to yours. The nature of your friendships change.

People often bore you with their issues.

There is a sense that you are not from "here"-- perhaps another planet or realm whose memories are surfacing at times in meditations or dreams. STARSEEDS TAKE THE QUIZ!

You sense that you are on a journey or soon will be taking a journey away from the physical planet.

You do not see yourself ever getting old, sick, or dying --- as if you will ascend or leave.

You have a desire to write a book. We all have a story to tell, it is our experience here...it's already written but you want to see how it ends.

The books you read, websites you search, are all about metaphysics-- healing your soul-- and searching for your mission.

Your sense of mission a feeling of urgency-- is ever present.

You feel a sense of completion of 3D Karma and a need to move into higher thought.

Your life takes a new direction which feels better than ever before. You sense that this is what you have been waiting for all your life -- something that has always been missing -- but will not be shown.

You get glimpses of other realities -- experience temporal distortions -- your psychic abilities increase.

You feel the energy changes on the grids on many levels.

You feel sleepy and tired more often as you body adjusts the higher frequency.  This is followed by a period of high energy and euphoria. Many people are feeling happy but they don't know why!!!

You become more aware of those who have crossed over-- when they are around and can communicatewith them with your thoughts and in a dream time.
The symbols you have seen in your thoughts and dreams -- the patterns you have doodled on paper or created into your art work -- now have meaning.

They are the keys to remembering your mission!